Fatherly Resolutions
At the start of the New Year I thought about some things I wish to promise regarding the impending newborn. These are things that I find to be a bit annoying or things that I don’t want to discover I am doing once the kid gets here. This is not to say that the people that do these things are wrong or annoying themselves. To each his/her own, but as for myself, I wish to pledge the following:
1. Baby pics as holiday cards – This is a thing that I observe each year and puzzle over. I know parents love their kids, and for some families this is the way relatives and friends can see these kids. But it makes me feel like these parents have reduced themselves to the point where they don’t matter, only the kid does, and that bothers me. I’d like to see a nice family picture, since its the parents that I’ve known for years, and I wouldn’t mind seeing them too. I have no problem with a photo of the family unit as a card, just when it’s the kid and no one else. So I pledge: No holiday cards that are of the kid alone. Either the family, or the pic is included in an actual card.
2. Age in months – I realize that for practicality the month is an appropriate unit to measure a newborn’s age during the first year or so. But as soon as the first year is past, then age by year is viable. Saying a kid is 6 months or 9 months is preferable to saying 1/2 years or 3/4 years old. I’d go so far as to use 13 or 14 months if precision is required. But beyond 15 months, the kid should be measured by years. I’ve seen a child referred to as 33 months old – that’s nearly 3 years. So I pledge (as a 415 month old): Once the kid hits 12 months, we mark it as 1 year and X months after that.
3. Absurd overprotection – I’m not saying I’ll let the kid wander around with knives and leave exposed power lines along the floorboards. There are alot of things that need to be done to protect the kid from his own curiosity. But I think you need to be realistic about it: Kids get hurt. It’s a given. Not to say that it’s not scary or traumatic, but this fear seems to manifest itself into irrational behavior. One thing I read is this: “If you have a metal or concrete coffee table with corners, you may want to consider getting rid of it for a round, wooden one”. The thought here is that a kid learning to walk could bang their head against the table. Sure, but they could also bang their head against a doorway. Do I have to round them off? How about the floor or wall? Should I pad them and turn my house into the asylum I’ve always thought I’d see? Okay, padding table edges for the relatively short time the kid is learning to walk is reasonable, but getting rid of furniture due to that one window of time seems excessive. The real rule here is to be conscientious, sensible, and preventative wherever possible. So I pledge: I will be reasoned and practical in my safety measures rather than arbitrary and stupid.
Please note that these were made well in advance of the actual kid being here. Attitudes can change, and I will happily feast on these words should I find myself signing my 19 month old kids photo holiday card with my feet up on my newly acquired round wooden coffee table.
